“No, please, I insist. 🥴You first.”

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During the holidays, it is easy to feel forced to appease others, rather than to be honest with what we really want for ourselves.

People Pleasing is something that a lot of us do more often than we think, and not just during the holidays.

Don’t get me wrong… being kind to someone is not the same people pleasing.

It’s when you are not being your authentic self. It’s when you lie to yourself in attempts of getting others to like you or approve of you… or to not rock the boat. When we do these things, it is considered people-pleasing, and it leads us down a slippery slope.

For example, if you are not OK spending time with unvaccinated family members and just don’t say anything to keep the peace, this is people-pleasing!!

Or if you just don’t want to spend time with Aunt Betty because you don’t even know how Aunty Betty is related to you, and you do it anyway, this is people-pleasing!

Or when you book yourself for 3-holiday parties because you’re scared you’ll hurt the host’s feelings, get uninvited next year or feel obligated for some other reason, this is people-pleasing!!

You don’t need to justify what you are doing and who you are doing it with or WHY to anyone but yourself.

Nobody says you HAVE to do anything this holiday season but you. Only you should make those decisions for yourself.

There is no rulebook saying the holidays are always uncomfortable.

It’s in your mind.

So ask yourself, what am I making not doing those things mean?

In the end, be truthful with yourself, which is the most important step in becoming your authentic self.

Know your limits, set your boundaries, and honor yourself this holiday season.