Social media is just one outlet people use to avoid the reality of life.
We use it to avoid personal feelings or situations that don’t feel good to us. To avoid things that are not fun.
Need an example?
Does fighting the urge to pick up your cellphone feel impossible?
Just becoming aware of how many times you reach for your phone throughout the day can be so enlightening. When you have the urge to check Instagram to see if you got any likes, ask yourself if you are doing it to make yourself feel good.
Why do you need that external validation?
What is that feeling you expect from seeing all the”likes” helping you really avoid?
Is it giving you a false sense of being liked or loved to reassure you when you are not feeling this way somewhere else?
Social media and our devices are just one outlet. Anything you do to avoid feeling a negative emotion is buffering.
So, when you over-work because that is how you tell yourself you are worthy, you’re buffering.
When you start doing laundry during scheduled work hours to avoid starting that daunting project, you are buffering.
When you have to drink at a party to loosen up and make yourself more fun and likable, you are buffering.
When you yell at your kids after a bad day at work in order to maintain some form of control, you are buffering.
All of these behaviors draw your focus away from what really needs your attention and help you not feel so bad… but only in that moment.
So, what are your negative feelings that you do your damndest to avoid?
Could you imagine yourself just feeling them?
What’s the worst that could happen if you did?
Yeah, it won’t feel good. And that’s the key to breaking the cycle.
