We often think we set boundaries to control other people’s behavior… WRONG.
If I could control what other people said or did, I would be QUEEN of the WORLD!
The truth is, setting boundaries is more about controlling what YOU do, it’s not about what other people do. 💯
To set a proper boundary, decide what YOU are going to do if someone breaches your space, your desires, your happiness. YOU SET YOUR BOUNDARIES TO RETAIN YOUR CONTROL.
The key when setting boundaries, as with most things, is honoring your commitment to YOURSELF.
So if you tell the person you are going to take that action, and you don’t follow through, then you are just making a vague threat that diminishes both your self-respect and the respect the other person has for you. When setting boundaries, follow-through is a MUST. 📢
Here is an example:
I’m happy to have you over, and if you choose to smoke I’ll ask you to go outside.
I’d love to go to lunch with you, and I am also inviting a few other friends in case you run late.
I’d love to spend the weekend with you, and I plan to spend some time alone for “Me Time” to recharge.
Master Life Coach Brooke Castillo says, “Love is always an option, and love is always the best option.”
Having unconditional love for yourself ‘no matter what means that you respect yourself enough to set healthy boundaries.
It means that you are able to be honest with and fully love others exactly as they are and that you let go of trying to control them. 💙
When you tell the truth about your needs and set boundaries and follow through with taking personal action, you are committing an act of self-love.
And when you have unconditional love for yourself, everything is possible! 🦋