There is often confusion around what self-pity actually is, and how it can affect your life.⁣


There is often confusion around what self-pity actually is, and how it can affect your life.⁣
First of all: ⁣
🚫 Self-pity is NOT the same as being depressed.⁣
Self-pity is feeling excessively sorry for yourself and discouraged about your current situation in life to the point that you are self-absorbed in it. 🌧️ It may cause you to seek sympathy from others, to the point that they start to avoid you.⁣
If you have an intolerance of negative emotions or thoughts, you might find yourself engaging in acts of self-sabotage anytime you start to feel unhappy. ⁣
These acts can include anything from making unhealthy food choices to relying on drugs or alcohol to give you a boost, or any kind of behavior that keeps you from living your best life. 🍟
Engaging in self-destructive behavior every time you have a negative feeling keeps you from learning healthy coping skills and leads to dependency as a coping mechanism.⁣
Self-pity keeps you in the trap of feeling bad about feeling bad, which leads to more self-destructive behavior, which serves as evidence of why you should continue to feel bad. And, the familiarity of self-pity is much more comfortable than the discomfort of pushing yourself to work through it, which makes it a vicious cycle.⁣
How to know if you’re feeling self-pity: ⁣
🔹 Are you making constant excuses for yourself?⁣
🔹 Do you set goals, not follow through and then blame outside factors?⁣
🔹 Do you find yourself saying that there is a lot of drama in your life?⁣
🔹 Are you exaggerating the negative things that happen to you?⁣
🔹 Do you seek empathy from others to validate your “injustices” and commiserate with you?⁣
🔹 Do you indulge and perseverate in feeling bad about feeling bad?⁣
If you answered yes to any of these questions, then congratulations! ⁣
Self-awareness is the first step toward shifting out of a self-pitying mindset and into an EMPOWERING mindset. I know it doesn’t feel good, but you did it.⁣
And an empowering mindset is where all positive change begins. ⁣
Let’s start your journey to change with me today. 🦋